The Journey with Self-Love

According to Wikipedia self-love is the strong sense of respect for and confidence in oneself.” I think loving yourself are those things, but much more. I think self-love is not only having respect for yourself as well as confidence, but ACCEPTANCE of yourself with flaws and all!

I stand at 6’2″ which is not only height above average for women, but men as well… I have these big lips, I’m skinny, and may be a little awkward looking to some. But I also have psoriasis, which gives this journey a bigger twist. Needless to say self-love has been a battle for me to do.

Kids at school would often tease me, but who wasn’t teased at that age? I actually did quite well hiding my skin from peers, to prevent giving them the chance to hit that soft spot with me and my psoriasis. My family and friends would always tell me that I was pretty, that my psoriasis didn’t matter, and that my personality was amazing… But still I didn’t love myself. The flaws that I seen blinded my ability to see the good within me, and stopped me from doing a lot of things. It’s hard to live up to society standards… People say you should wear your hair a certain way, be a certain weight or look a certain way… And along with those expectations is flawless skin, which with psoriasis seems impossible to achieve.

There have been many days and nights were I’ve cried asking God why did he make me this way? Why couldn’t I look like “everyone else.” But then I asked myself what does that really mean? Beauty comes in all forms.

About a year ago I just got tired of feeling sorry for myself! I got tired of feeling depressed and asking “why me.” I decided that it is a lot less stressful just to love yourself. But even with respecting myself, and having confidence… the number one thing I had to do was ACCEPT my flaws. That has been the biggest battle… And the biggest flaw in my eyes has been this psoriasis.

I have my ups and downs, but I am truly working on my self love, and it feels great!  I do what makes me happy and feels good, and everything else seems to fall into place. Even “coming out the closet” about my psoriasis has been liberating, because I no longer have to hide and keep this so called secret… And to my surprise a lot of people are more accepting than I could have ever imagined.

One thing that I’ve learned through my battle with psoriasis is the beauty that is inside a person, is truly more significant than the way a person looks on the outside… I can say that I am truly humbled.

Author Description

Just a girl with psoriasis.

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2 Responses to “The Journey with Self-Love”

  1. March 18, 2012

    Mike Barratt Reply

    This is a touching and inspirational story! As a kid who was made fun of because I was poor and a little bit of a nerd, I can totally relate in a different kind of way. I had to learn how to stand up for myself and be strong.

    I think your psoriasis is a reminder of how strong you are. Being able to openly and honestly share this on your site is another sign of your strenght.

    Don’t let others determine your worth or beauty, you determine that.

    I say f*** society standards. By and large, most people in society are average. They give up on their dreams. They settle. They are unhappy. Don’t be like others and certainly don’t try and live up to society’s standards. Society’s plan is failing many people. Creat your own plan and spend your life perfecting and executing that plan.

    • March 18, 2012

      marieb411 Reply

      Thanks for reading and commenting Mike… its always wondering to hear a males perspective on these types of subjects.

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